The Infallibly Polite Speaking Alarm Clock (Image courtesy Hammacher Schlemmer)
By Andrew Liszewski

Nothing is more jarring in the morning than that terrible buzzing sound emitted by the cheapest of cheap alarm clocks. So even though this Infallibly Polite Speaking Alarm Clock from Hammacher Schlemmer comes with a steep $99.95 price tag, it’s totally worth the cost since it plays one of 126 different wake-up messages in the calming voice of Reginald Jeeves, played by Stephen Fry in the series Jeeves and Wooster.

It’s almost impossible to wake up in a bad mood when you’ve been cajoled out of bed with phrases like “Excuse me sir, I’m so sorry to disturb you, but it appears to be morning… Very inconvenient, I agree… I believe it is the rotation of the Earth that is to blame, sir.” And if you still don’t feel like getting up, hitting the clock’s rosette acts like a snooze button which also triggers one of 10 additional replies including “Sir has a firm touch, but fair.” It’s like having your very own English butler, except that you’ll have to make your own breakfast once you’re up.

[ The Infallibly Polite Speaking Alarm Clock ]